Couples and Relationships

Are You Struggling To Maintain An Important Relationship?

Do you feel misunderstood, alone or unloved in your marriage or partnership? Perhaps your interactions are overshadowed by long spells of silence, or you continue to have the same disagreement/fight over and over. Do you wish you could feel more desired and cared for and able trust in your and your partner’s capacity to overcome challenges as a team?
pexels-photo-265702 (1)Are you experiencing communication problems or power struggles with a coworker or client at work and don’t know how to mediate the situation? Do you wish you were able to voice your concerns safely and feel satisfied with your work and enjoy your colleagues and work environment?

Perhaps you and your child are not connecting, and you worry that he or she may be engaging in risky behavior or falling behind in school. Do you wish you could better understand what he or she is going through and feel valued and loved by your child? Do you want to be supportive of your child’s chances for success and fulfillment?

Are you taking care of a loved one, and feel alone, scared, overworked, underappreciated and in need of caregiver support? Perhaps you want to find a healthier balance between your wellbeing and caring for your loved one, but the demands and stress of providing the best care possible is overwhelming and you are unable to relax.

If you’re experiencing any of the scenarios above, it may be time to seek the guidance of a skilled relationship therapist. Constant tension, stress and conflict in your day-to-day relationships can be a lonely, confusing and draining experience. Relationship stress can impact every aspect of your life and leave you feeling hopeless, guilty, irritable and unable to focus on anything but the pain of disconnection. If you spend a considerable amount of time thinking about the relationship in turmoil and feel as though you don’t have the proper tools to deal with the situation, you may be close to giving up, questioning if moving forward is even possible.

Each Relationship Comes With Unique Challenges

If you are struggling to connect physically and emotionally with your spouse or partner, communicate with a coworker, bond with your child or cope with the stress of caregiving, you are not alone. It’s completely normal to become irritated, have disagreements, and face challenges with the important people in your life. We all experience complex and diverse relationship difficulties, and the stress you experience in your close-knit relationships is often reflective of day-to-day stressors. With our busy lives, financial concerns and social microaggressions toward race, sexuality, religion and more, it’s becoming increasingly common for people to experience high levels of anxiety and depression. It’s common to assume that others share your hopes and values, which can lead to lapses in communication and unbalanced power dynamics. The truth is we all see things differently, and it takes work to learn how to live harmoniously. Although it’s normal for people to disagree and face challenges, if you’re constantly preoccupied with confronting or navigating relationship challenges, relationship therapy can help. A skilled relationship therapist can provide you with insight and practical guidance needed to bring more satisfaction and compassion into your everyday life.

Relationship Counseling Can Help You Heal And Overcome Challenges

Relationship counseling can be beautifully and powerfully effective in helping you identify and heal burdensome grid-lock issues within your relationships. Whether you’re seeking marriage counseling,
pexels-photo-59059pre-marriage counseling, couples counseling, family counseling or general relationship advice, you can develop deeper insights into your needs and relationship patterns and discover how they impact you. Together, we can identify areas of dissatisfaction and develop a positive path forward.

In safe, non-judgmental relationship therapy sessions, you can openly explore your innermost concerns and in return receive unconditional support and attention. I honor wherever you are and provide tailor-made techniques and coping strategies designed to address your unique personality, situation and concerns. During session, we will closely examine history and work to uncover the sources of pain that have been keeping you stuck. There are motivations for every behavior. Some are known and others are unrecognized. You can learn to identify and break free of behavioral cycles that are not benefiting you. You can also talk through specific challenges you’ve encountered with this particular person and develop insights into the other person’s experience. Once you’ve increased self-awareness and better understand the origins of where your relationship conflicts stem from, we can work collaboratively as you make empowering changes in your life. You can learn to manage difficulties differently with new insights, allowing for lasting and profound growth and transformation.

If you’re wrapped up in an unacceptable relationship dynamic or work environment that brings your physical and/or emotional safety into question, or you’ve made up your mind to separate from your partner, relationship counseling can still help. I support and honor the choices you make, and can help you devise an exit strategy and empower and prepare you for the changes ahead.

I’ve been helping individuals and couples with relationship challenges since 1994. In addition to my extensive professional on-job experience, I have specialized training in the Gottman and Schnarch methodology for couples counseling. I have helped many couples, individuals and families heal, connect and move forward. It’s absolutely possible to gain insight into yourself and those around you and make lasting changes.

Although you’re experiencing relationship problems, you may still have some questions or concerns about the process…

I’m afraid of being rejected by the person I need to confront.  

I understand there may be a lot at stake in your relationship. You may need to confront a boss, but fear the possibility of termination or other consequences. Your marriage may be so rocky that you or your partner has threatened divorce. With that being said, over time if relationship problems are not addressed they could worsen, inviting unforeseen repercussions. The beauty of relationship counseling is that you get to practice confrontation in a safe, controlled space with a professional that can help you assess and name your needs. Counseling allows you the opportunity to uncover the root of the pain you’re experiencing, heal and to move forward. There is hope that things can get better. Rejection may not be the worst thing that could happen. It could present an opportunity for honesty, vulnerability and real enduring/lasting change.

Shouldn’t I be able to handle this on my own?

It’s very common in our culture to feel as though you should rely on yourself, even when you’re struggling. However, the idea that we have to take care of everything on our own can lead to more suffering. If you continue to behave in the same way, you can’t expect to achieve different results. If you’re having a tough time getting through to someone or healing old wounds, you deserve support and help. It’s possible to practice compassion for yourself. You don’t have to go through this alone.

I’ve heard relationship counseling can be expensive.

Although there is a cost involved in this work, therapy is an investment in the most valuable thing you
pexels-photo-233223 (1) possess—you. When you feel balanced and good about yourself, it opens opportunities to invite hope and happiness into your life. Left unresolved, relationship issues can become even more complicated and feelings of anxiety, sadness and yearning can worsen. Plus, therapy can save you emotional and monetary costs down the road, such as the price of divorce or seeking different employment. It can also provide the opportunity to ask for what you need, demonstrating the self-respect you deserve.

You Can Create And Sustain Healthy Relationships 

If you’re struggling with a family member, spouse, partner, client or coworker and would like to learn more about relationship counseling or receive marriage guidance, please call 520-268-8890 for a free 15-minute phone consultation. My practice is located in Tucson, AZ.

“We carry within us the wonder we seek outside of us.”

-Sir Thomas Browne